Having spent the last five weeks looking at the subject of faith and the different aspects regarding it. This week we reflect on the topic of DOUBT.
I remember hearing Jeff Lucas, an international speaker, author, and church leader recounting a story where he was about to preach at Spring Harvest and the moment before he was announced, whilst standing on the main stage the thought ran through his mind ‘Does God even exist?’, a moment of panic and doubt suddenly flooded through his body!
Somehow, I found hearing this from a Christian of his status strangely comforting and encouraging – that it wasn’t just me that this sort of thing happened to. Perhaps you feel the same?
Doubt is a state of uncertainty, a place where we lack any conviction perhaps about something or someone that we once had full trust in. Doubt can sometimes catch us off guard, infiltrate our mind before we realise and creep up on our soul without any warning. Doubt has this way of making our faith feel like it is false.
The most famous doubter of them all is the disciple Thomas who, because of one moment recorded in John’s gospel, ended up with the unfortunate nickname ‘doubting Thomas’, and yet the account of his seeming lack of faith and doubting words are helpful for us today, especially in the rawness and moments of our own struggles and difficulties, where we find doubt creeping in.
Thomas spent three years being blown away by his master’s teaching, seeing the miraculous, learning from the most influential and powerful teacher ever. Placing his entire life into the hands of ‘His’ rabbi, his saviour, the messiah – only for it all to end, literally in death.
Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So, the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!”
But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”
A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”
Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!”
Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”John 20:25-29 NIV
Thomas hears news from his fellow disciples that Jesus was alive, but he doesn’t accept it. Thomas wanted to see Jesus’ hands to touch where the nails were. His doubt had taken him to a place where nothing else would do, only then would he believe! I am sure many of us have felt similar but in our own circumstance and context.
However, this short passage gives us so much HOPE! Here are three things for us to reflect on and be encouraged by.
- The other disciples still accept Thomas even in his doubt. We don’t read that they tried to convince him (although they may have done), we don’t see them rebuke him or distant themselves from him. The other disciples appear to stay with him, to accept and remain close to him despite his doubts. This is what church should be like – we walk with people, alongside them even in their doubts. They truly loved each other, and doubts didn’t stop that.
- Jesus shows up! A week (of doubt) passes, Thomas is with the other disciples when Jesus appears and lovingly allows him to place his finger on the holes where the nails were, to touch his side where the spear went through and to see Jesus – risen – alive. All that Thomas wanted and needed at that moment was fulfilled, you can imagine all the doubt and anxiety just washing away, the disappointment evaporating and an exuberant joy filling Thomas up. “Stop doubting and believe” Jesus says. Perhaps, today we need to hear those words also. Jesus is real, he is alive, he will NOT let you down, let go of the doubt.
- We read that Jesus did many more signs in the presence of his disciples. However, his final words here are greatly encouraging. “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” For us today we probably won’t see the physical Jesus unless we are here when he returns, some may see visions but for most of us we live by faith not by sight. We can be confident that in our moments of doubt, Jesus will come to us by the Holy Spirit, speak to us through his word and reveal himself to us in some way, but even if he didn’t, we can trust him, and our faith will not be in vain.
May we take comfort and encouragement from this passage and every day, just like Thomas, declare:
“My Lord and My God”.
– Mark.
